Welcome to my new favorite past time: Blogging at the Beach! I also like to call it Keeping Sand Off My Laptop, Ridiculous Bliss, or The Amazing Wifi Search. But hey, I’m here, I am sitting on the beach as we speak (type/read?), and well, cross that off the bucket list.
So far, I have done a little hanging out in the freezing cold water until I become numb enough that I can trick myself into thinking it’s warm, and I have almost had a pelican land on me. Some other highlights of Beach-Blogging include tanning (or in my case, burning while mysteriously not feeling it ever), looking at myself in my laptop screen (sunshine=yay, glare=nay), and, oh yes, people-watching! My mom and I also partook in some bird-watching earlier, but in case the funny looking bird whom we saw and named Frankie does not interest you, I’ll document some people-watching fun here. Please enjoy this guide to People of the Beach.
1. Basic Girls Tanning
This is the one you think of, the girls who are one or usually all of three things: in their late teens/early twenties, tan, and trying to get tanner. They often wear bikinis and sunglasses, magazine optional. The one nearest me is wearing an orange bikini that somewhat resembles her skin.
Ah, the children. They are generally fascinated with one or all of a few activities. The first is the most popular: running a few feet into the water, standing there in awe, and then promptly turning and running, terrified, out of the water as it chases them back to shore. (Who are we kidding, beach-goers of all ages partake in this activity). The next one is searching thoroughly for shells. And the last is building sand castles that look more like giant lumps. They often, as is the case with the child nearest me, pick up handfuls of wet sand and toddle over to their lump to continue building their lumpy sand empire. Repeat.
3. Cool Surfers
The surfers frequent beaches all the time, though I can’t imagine why. You can recognize them by their surf boards, their wet suits, and their air of ” laid-back SoCal coolness”. They will often parade up and down the shoreline, boards in hand, as if to make sure as many people at the beach as possible are aware of their abilities. Sometimes they even band together when they see each other as part of an exclusive surfers-only club to which you have not been invited. (You now probably think that I am either mean for no reason or bitter because I too wish I knew how to surf. Honestly, it’s both.)
4. Wholesome Families
These can range from all-American-stereotypical-über-wholesome (the family on Leave it to Beaver) to incredibly dysfunctional and determined not to show it (my family, God bless ’em). Either way, they are always there, out for a relaxing day of getting sand everywhere and finding it still all over them later.
5. Beach Rubble
The final thing you will most definitely find at the beach, especially one in America where the trash is abundant and the people are lazy, is your beach rubble. This can range from seagull feathers to peanut shells to peach pits (all of which are near me somewhere). Until us Americans become less lazy and more environmentally conscious or something, the beach rubble will probably be here to stay. Just make sure your child knows it’s not another shell.
I hope that this user-friendly guide assists you in categorizing your people watching when at the beach. Until next time!
Submitted with undying love for,
beach-blogging, People of the Beach, vacations, Spring Break, wearing a cardigan even on a beach, and Frankie the Bird,
I remain Madilyn Jayne Turken